Wednesday, March 22, 2006

All Chappell's men

Team India .. uh-oh were you playing Santa Claus in Mumbai (perhaps a bit too early)?

In that case, well done. Thank you very much.

The Guardian reports:

"You know things are going your way when 'c Panesar b Udal' appears on the scorecard," says Dan Jones. "A collector's item if ever I saw one."

A story for grandchildren.

The outcome was so fantastic it left everyone in a state of utter disbelief and disarray. I heard unconfirmed reports from London where people were pinching others just to make sure nobody was hallucinating.

Wankhede, March 22 2006 to be remembered for everything that could go wrong, going wrong and that's putting it midly. It is right up there with Eden Gardens 2001 for "things that you will never ever see happening again in your lifetime" for all wrong reasons.

Rahul: Did Freddie give that you-must-be-kidding-me look when you opted to field? I am just curious.

The decision to field first in the event Rahul wins the toss must have been a "team" decision beforehand. Let me update you Coach. Right now that decision is fighting for a place in the top three dumbest cricketing decisions ever taken on Indian soil.

Did the team management consult Tendulkar or Jaffer? Seriously I want know.

As a classic cricket quickie unfolded - last seven wickets adding 25 runs - a gritty bunch of virtual unknowns rewrote the cricket history - Karma of highest order.

Congratulations Freddie and your extended family. Please send a piece of cake to Coach Chappell as a token of goodwill. He will appreciate it.

What happened was truly inexplicable. I am willing to believe that the aliens came the night before the Mumbai Test and duly sucked all intelligence out of you know whos' head.

Perhaps Mr. Chappell knows the answer and he is not telling us. He probably wants us to believe this is an this point your guess is only as good as mine.

May be his answer lies in the future as we suffer in the present.

Team India should have won the series hands down. PERIOD. Half of the touring side played in the Mumbai test wouldn't make it to the Mumbai team.

And we lost c-o-m-p-r-e-h-e-n-s-i-v-e-l-y.

Perhaps Mr. Chappell, you can tell us why and what went wrong?

If your innovations during the practice sessions led to more than a dozen dropped catches in the field, it is time to send your friend and trainer packing.

Perhaps the constant tinkering with the batting line up made everyone insecure?

Why wasn't Mr. Kaif playing after his match saving innigs at Nagpur? What message does it send to players who are performing? ...that the whims and fancies of a genius in the making matters more than performance on the field?

Why was a certain VVS Laxman sitting out?

Mr. Chappell MBE, now that you been thoroughly outthought and outcoached by Mr. Duncan Fletcher OBE, what's next? (OBE outranks MBE)

Shall we play a test series against Bangladesh or Kenya or Zimbabwe?

My apologies to bring this up at your moment of sadness. If you care to remember Mr. Chappell, we lost to Pakistan 1-0 in the test series too.

You have a lot on your plate right now. We need answers.

This just in: The OBE (Officer of the Order of the British Empire) might as well be your next Honor and they are ready to bend the rules for you.


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